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Honesty Circles: How Can Money Be Your Friend? (Part 2) | Honesty Circles
Host:

30 Nov 2020, Mon
7:30 PM - 9:30 PM (+08:00)
Singapore (Zoom)

In response to rising concerns and worries surrounding money among young people, Playmoolah is bringing you a 2-part series called Honesty Circles which aims to uncover how changing hidden money narratives in our lives can lead to greater freedom and a more empowering lifestyle. We are launching this on zoom, so you can join us in the comforts of your own room!

 

Part 1: Is Money Your Friend or Foe? (23 Nov, 7:30pm-9:30pm)

Does money worry you or make you feel anxious? Is money causing you unnecessary stress? Are you burdened by the thought of making more money?

Is it truly about money or is there an unspoken narrative hidden beneath that is causing all the destruction? Through honest dialogue and reflections, come discover what money narratives are, and how certain unhealthy narratives may be affecting our lives.

 

Part 2: How Can Money Be Your Friend? (30 Nov, 7:30pm-9:30pm)

In this follow-up circle, we shall be focusing on writing new money narratives that can turn money from a foe to a friend that can help us live a more stress-free and empowering life.

Come listen to how others have changed their money narratives in ways that have improved their relationship with money and their lives, and discover how yours can be changed.

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We welcome all young adults aged 19-25. 

TO REGISTER, kindly RSVP and we shall email you the instructions on how to join our session online. As only those who have attended Part 1 are invited to participate in Part 2, we shall email you the registration link for Part 2 only after you have attended Part 1. 

In registering for this event, you consent to the collection and processing of your personal information for the purposes of this event only, in accordance with the Personal Data Protection Act (2012).

 

Posts

Do you find yourself fighting, arguing, getting annoyed with your spouse, boyfriend, children or parents about money? Walking away from the fight not having any clear resolutions or perhaps never ever bringing up that topic, ever again? Why do we fight about money? Why is it a source of tension, what really are we fighting about? 

1. Understanding my narratives around money — Having a visual picture of what narratives to money I have. With that clear in your head, it helps one to understand what are the underlying narratives drive you. Take for instance, “Money is never enough”, “I hate money”, “Money is security, for saving”, “Money is power” or “Money is the root of all evil”, these scripts form the foundation of how one relates to money. They end up unconsciously being the lens of how we see the world and affects how we judge the actions of our spouse, partner or loved ones. Perhaps even of how we judge ourselves! 

We need to realise that what we see is often time on the surface, and the way to understand transformative change is to first take a look at the deeper layers where our values, beliefs are held. The past experiences and the narratives we hold allow us to touch the heart of the issue instead of reading what’s generally on the surface. 


The money narrative that was passed down to me by my father was that it is a gift and a means to an end. He was always generous and didn’t care too much to “store” for the future. For my spouse, money is security and power.  Hence when we have a fight around money, it often leads to a gridlock as we fail to understand what’s underlying it. 

2. New money narratives, new paradigm shifts—

They emerge when we: 

a) have too much pain, at a breaking point and we’ve come to realise that the old scripts, no longer serve us 

b) we are tired of the fights, tensions and arguments in our relationships that we now feel it’s time for change 

c) have been the source of our tensions, recognizing that money is the trigger most of the time for what’s really beneath the surface. The truth is, the tensions in relationships are often rooted in the inability to trust, the lack of security, expectations of my partner, mindset of scarcity, feelings of insufficiency, envy, or even that money equates to power. 

I’ve come to realise that, we can recreate and redefine some of these narratives around money for ourselves and the next generation. 

Here are the money narratives of the collective wisdom that have empowered people and relationships.

Money is a tool for a purposeful life 

Money is a gift, for stewardship 

Money is a consequence of an exchange of value creation

Money used is used to invest in the good of relationships, in people, society and for the planet

Money enables others positively 

Money enables dreams

Here’s how I have recreated my money narrative from “money is a gift” to “money enables dreams”.  I also see myself as the steward of resources, namely money and time as they have the same value to me.

My 7-year-old recently expressed that she has a dream of living in a big house where everyone can be together. When I heard that, it gave me a purpose to work hard and earn more money so that this dream can be realised. While I never had that dream for myself, it now becomes a family dream. Through this experience, I learned that I can’t accept the narrative that money is safety (my spouse’s) but I can certainly accept the new narrative that money enables dreams and that I am a steward of money. It is up to me how to manage it in order to reach our family potential and dreams. 

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