Hc money   shame

Honesty Circles: How Much Is Enough?

20 Sep 2017, Wed
7:00 PM - 10:00 PM (+08:00)
National Volunteer and Philanthropy Centre @ #04-88 (BLUE ZONE), The Central, 6 Eu Tong Sen Street, SG 059817

Directions to NVPC: Take the lift or the escalator (next to Owndays) to the 4th floor of The Central (above Clarke Quay station), and head to the BLUE ZONE. It's around the corner with a long corridor seemingly leading to nowhere, but it actually leads to the venue, i.e. the first glass door on your left. 

Please do have your dinner first. And we look forward to see you this evening! 

Money can mean many things - freedom, power, stuff, experiences, social acceptance and so on. To many of us, the biggest thing money gives us is security. Money is security. But is this protection rightly placed, or misplaced?

In this month’s Honesty Circle, we dive deep to explore the relationship between money and security. What types of security does money bring to you? What are you scared of losing? What fears are you easing? How much is enough? How do we build true resilience for an uncertain future? Join us in this safe, open space to talk about and take control of your relationship with money.

This event is held at A Good Space, Where Good People and Ideas Meet. An initiative of NVPC.


I constantly worry about not having enough money. To me, money means security - it makes me feel safe, and that is a basic need. With money, I feel protected that I can guard against any danger or threat, and the more money I have, the more secure I will be.

But no matter how much I save, it never seems to be enough - and so the question is, enough for what? Planning to have enough for my material needs is the easy part. With some math, I can work out how much money I need for a simple lifestyle, a house, kids, adjust the values for inflation, and create a savings and investment plan. But as every insurance agent would tell you, there are so many things that could happen to me and my loved ones that are not in my control. What if...

What if my parents get sick? What if I lose my job? What if I get struck with a rare chronic illness? What if my child has special needs? What if all of this were to happen at the same time?

This is my inner storyteller on steroids, and could go on ad infinitum. And the first awakening came to me when I realized what a strange idea it was that peace will come only when I have enough money to cover the full set of possibilities that could ever go wrong. At this rate, no amount of money would ever be enough and would only feed even more worry and bring continual struggle inside. The more I could see that my storyteller was driven by fear, judgement, and despair, and that I had a choice to move towards joy and healing, the more its visits became shorter.

Over time, I've also noticed that I was building security in money (and other downstream capital) may be at the expense of more upstream capital. For example, working overtime to earn money at the expense of my health, or time with my loved ones. And at a more systemic level, if we all chase “financial security” by investing in the most profitable companies without regard to where the profit comes from, we may be exacerbating climate change, a global widening income gap that is a ticking time bomb, and businesses trying to cut cost in all kinds of ways that in turn compromises real safety in the recent incidences of air travel, or the quality of food we put into our mouth. And with these increasing threats, we feel the further need for more security, and may soon see the need for more insurance.. to what end?

Might financial security perhaps be just one kind of security that is an externally-oriented quest for happiness? Maybe we should start turning the question around - Instead of finding security in money, what really DO we want to find security in? How much of it is found in money? Or in being part of a community of rich culture, talents, and gifts? How much of it is found in our ability to grow our own food or make the stuff we need? Or deal with adversity? Or how much of it is it in the warm embrace of people we love?


Seed Questions

  • What do you find security in?
  • How much of security do you find in money?
  • How can we start building security in a “real” way that positively reinforces itself in a way that less and less money is actually needed over time?
    Spinner a50c54766e77ea53b2b04a686d9ab4cf0e0fcf639eb2d0de00f329f1b8451287

Sorry! Stories are only accessible to the circle participants who have shared their reflections.